Thursday, November 15, 2007

My Fav Steven Wright Jokes

* Someone sent me a postcard picture of the earth. On the back it said, "Wish you were here."

* Cross Country skiing is great if you live in a small country.

* I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

* "Did you sleep well?" "No, I made a couple of mistakes."

* It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.

* Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.

* What's another word for Thesaurus?

* If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?

* If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?

* I saw a bank that said "24 Hour Banking", but I don't have that much time.

* I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

* For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier...I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

* I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people who live above me are furious!

* I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.

1 comment:

nathan said...

French toast during the Renaissance...that's great.